By The Way...my baby died.: The funeral.

A pictorial description of Jackson Bear's funeral.

We carried Jackson in a coffin that a friend made for us. Our master craftsman friend made it from timber from a wind-fallen tree, milled by other friends, from a forest I once lived in. The tree was a Tingle tree; a rare and ancient, giant and wondrous tree, that grows only in one magical tiny area on the whole planet- all of 30 square kilometres on the south coast of Western Australia. A tree from forest that much of my life has been dedicated to protecting. The latin name for the Tingle Tree is 'Eucalyptus Jacksonii', the perfect tree to be made into the 'boat' to carry our Jackson.

We carried him to the sounds of our family and friends crying.

I felt like a proud mother presenting my son to the world.

Laying Jackson down on the rug his grandmother made.

We asked everyone to bring a teddy bear to give to Jackson during the ceremony. We were given a teddy bear in hospital, and these bears will go on to other bereaved families. It was beautiful to watch everyone come forward and spend a moment with Jack.

Mum, Dad and Jack in his 'boat', with Jack's teddy bear.

Some friends said to me afterwards, that the funeral sometimes felt like a wedding, that it was just full of love shining for each other and our boy. I see what they mean in this photo. Ever glad that death has not shattered this love, but that we've been one of the lucky couples brought closer together. Actually, I think he's cracking one of his infamous bad dad jokes at this point.

Our Celebrant is a dear friend, the wife of our wonderful coffin/boat making friend. She led our friends in a meditation called The Web. Everyone touched the person next to them, until we were all joined, and through us, touching Jack. A powerful and supporting moment in the day.

I'm holding a secret. It's a box of butterflies. I can feel the butterflies kicking, ready to fly. It feels exactly like holding my belly and feeling Jack kick. A precious box of baby kicks.

Everyone gasps as I release the 12 butterflies. I feel our hearts soaring with the butterflies, Jack is free. When I stand up, one of them flutters back down and lands on my hip, staying just a while..